CCM: Thursday, part 1

On Thursday, I woke up as late as I could get away with, since I had fallen asleep around six thirty or something in the morning. I wasn't thrilled to be going into a party on that little sleep, but it was sort of inevitable and there was nothing I could do about it.

The day started out with Paul and I filming with Sarah Gregory for Northern Spanking-- you can read his notes on the shoot here. Paul started working out ideas for scenarios weeks ago, and it was kind of fascinating to see his process. Because we were filming in the hotel, Paul created a set of scenarios which made sense for us to be in such a setting instead of trying to pretend that we were somewhere else and this lead to some rather creative thinking on his part. I was a little nervous about filming because it was my first time ever being on camera for some of the scenes and it was my first time actually filming with Sarah! We've known each other for a while, and we roomed together and I shot a scene for her site while we were at TASSP, so we were comfortable around each other, but we had never actually done any films together until this day.

From my shoot for Sarah's site back in June

Filming with Sarah went quickly and smoothly, since she (obviously!) knows what she's doing. Two of the scenes we shot included her bottoming, which she only does rarely these days, so that was kind of special. The first scene involved Paul playing a seedy private detective and Sarah being a cheating wife who he catches at her meeting place. This was the first time that I got to watch Paul spanking another girl for a film in real life: every time we'd filmed together previously, I was the only one getting spanked. I enjoyed getting to watch this scene, even if through the camera, especially because Paul's character was a bit wicked and I've always enjoyed those sorts of scenes. :D Sarah looked great, too, in her sexy lingerie (but then again, she always looks great!)

The second scene involved me getting spanked by Sarah and is the first film that the two of us have done together. We'd played during group roleplay events before, but never on camera. Sarah is a great top and is easy to roleplay with, and the spanking that she gave me was delightful. Additionally, this was the first time in my entire life that I wore heels with jeans, and I think I like the look! I'd never done it before because I avoided heels except for the most specialist of occasions since I used to have height related self esteem issues, but those don't bother me anymore so I've been enjoying experiments like this. :D In the film, I play a sneaky, snarky writer who gets caught in a hotel I've written poor reviews of many times by an irate manager, played by Sarah. I consider scenes where I'm unabashedly not repentant for me behavior a challenging area for me, but I think I'm getting better at it. When I need clever snark, I ask myself what Erica Scott would say. When I need to be bratty and awful, I borrow a page from The Bad Alex's daily life. I think that the film ended up being great: funny and full of delightful girl/girl spanking action. ^_^

Scene number the third was between Sarah and Paul again, with Sarah playing a second-rate erotic author and Paul playing her irate publisher. This scene ended up being particularly funny, and I had to keep my composure behind the camera and not giggle at their antics (which I did manage to do, thankfully!) Sarah looks lovely in jeans, I have to say. :P

The final scene was between Paul and I, and it was actually the first time that we'd played on camera since the end of March, so that was pretty exciting. This was our original type of interaction, and it was nice to return to it, now bringing the massive chemistry that comes when two people know each other as intimately as we now do. It was also the first time that we did a film in which we played a couple since we actually became one, so that was a bit sweet. Paul was vague about the description of this film's content in his post so I suppose that I had better be, too, but it's a cute story with a delightful caning in it which was hard enough that when it was finished, Sarah marveled at my composure.

I helped pick out some of the images that Paul put up on the forum when he wrote about this shoot, and this was one of the ones that I chose. I like it for the normal reasons: I look scared and vulnerable, Paul looks determined and threatening et cetera, but also because of his shadow on the curtain. I like imagining that we're on a ground floor and a passerby might see this silhouette from outside and perhaps stop to watch the shadow-puppet version of my thrashing. How deliciously voyeuristic!

When we had finished shooting, I had to run off pretty much right away because I had an appointment in Detention! Joe (Drlectr) and Mama Blue were running a series of short "Principal's office" detention scenarios and I was scheduled for shortly after the filming finished. Joe and I have played hundreds of times, and he's one of the people with whom I've played the most intimately and emotionally intensely, but we've never really done any roleplay scenarios. I know that he's fond of school style paddling scenes, and I love any kind of roleplay which is highly formalized, so I figured the scene was going to be good. I take great delight in the embarrassment of having someone else watching me be punished, like Vice Principal Blue!

I was already in my uniform so I ran up to Joe and Ten's room to wait outside the doorway. They were talking to someone in the room, so I had to wait outside.

Waiting in this hallway, knowing that in a minute, I was about to be paddled and that it would be quite severe was something directly from my fantasy life. Everyone on the floor was at the Crimson Moon party, which meant that everyone who passed and saw me stood outside Joe's room in my uniform knew that I was waiting for my detention. This also meant that they weren't judging me, but that didn't remove the squirmy feeling in my tummy every time someone walked by. Finally, Joe, now Principal Lectr, opened the door and called me in.

A lot of my roleplay characters are helpless and innocent, but that was certainly not the case today. The scene that Joe and I had written involved me being in trouble for attempting to seduce my male teachers, and I was full of confidence and eroticism, flirting with Principal Lectr even as he lectured me on my wicked ways. "You seem to think this is alright!" Vice Principal Blue said in dismay. "You're going to have to start seeing the school counselor once a week!"

"Will it be a male counselor?" I asked with a flirtatious grin. The authority figures had had enough of me, so I was bent over the desk for eight paddle swats, which were delivered firmly and on the bare. The paddling wasn't much of a sanction for me, though, and I kept up my act, hoping for a little extra attention. I got just that, in the form of a hard, OTK spanking after the paddling. When the scene was over, Mama Blue took off and Joe and I got to enjoy some time together. Joe is wonderful. I'm so lucky to have him in my life.

After this, Joe walked me back to my room and we told Paul about our roleplay. Then Paul and I took a little time to regroup before heading down for dinner. We hadn't had much lunch, so we mostly used this as a time to socialize and see who was at the party already before heading out to get a bite and some drinks nearby. During dinner, Naughty Freckles asked me if I'd be willing to be a rope-bunny for the "Fit to be Tied and Spanked" demo later that night, which I gladly accepted. Bondage can be a lot of fun, and I do get a little thrill out of performing in front of a group. Between dinner and the demo, Paul and I ran to the store (without me ever bothering to change out of my school uniform!) and then got back in time to be able to socialize a bit before I needed to start. Paul finally got to meet LLB, who is very dear to my heart, and a handful of my other friends.

Then it was time for the demo! Kinkmedic, from 12:11 Kink taught some basic ties and showed how they can be used for spanking. This included tying me up, including in a bent over position where he then balanced a cup of Mountain Dew on my back while I tried very hard to stay still. Afterwards, they passed out rope and people practiced the ties and I allowed people to practice on me, too. It was a lot of fun, and the ties were effective, easy and comfortable. "A+ would be tied up by again!"rating!

After the demo, we snuck out and ate dinner, then ran into about 15 of my favorite people who were entering the restaurant as we were leaving. We headed upstairs, where I probably got changed again and we went to Joe and Ten's suite. There were only a few people hanging out in there, since most everyone else had gone to dinner, but I had a good time talking to everyone, including the person behind Spanking Resource (I don't know if he uses a particular name online or not!) and a few others.
At one point I did something out of line and needed to be spanked (gasp!) so Paul selected one of Big Bubba's Bible Belts and applied it to me. Big Bubba is a friend of mine who does leatherworking, and his belts with "Bible" stamped on them are a perennial favorite. It started out as just a pun, but the belts are fairly lightweight, delightfully pliable and capable of being used across intensities. This instance of the implement belongs to Joe, and it's obvious that he's spanked about 108 girls with it because it was delightfully well broken in and clearly an implement "of joy!" It was stingy in a light and delicious way... dare I say it was even "sensual." I didn't want the spanking to stop, ever! I made Paul promise that we'd buy one for ourselves at the vendor's fair.

The next thing that I wrote in my notes is "Bad Alex is Bad." I have no idea what particular incident this refers to, because that's kind of like writing notes on a day out hiking and saying "The sky is blue." A while before the party, Bad Alex and I were arguing back and forth and I called her some kind of awful insult, as we tend to do to each other. Instead of just responding with one of her signature, creative insults ("your breath smells like Bigfoot's dick") Bad Alex decided to write a long and carefully worded email to Paul, explaining how I had wronged her and how she wanted to keep my "good girl status intact" by telling on me "for my own good." I'm sure she said "I'm just a little girl" somewhere in there, too. Of course I ended up getting caned, because there's no fairness anywhere in the Universe when Bad Alex is involved (remember, I once got 14 strokes of the cane because she punched me in the knee!)
At CCM, she continued this masquerade of being a good girl who is unfairly accused by me by being sweet and polite whenever Paul was around and then turning around and insulting or slapping me when he wasn't looking. He always seemed to be looking when I retaliated, though, and I was soon jumping up and down at the unfairness of it all. I had high hopes of seeing Alex properly punished sometime this weekend, though, and my best bet was at Spanking Court on Saturday night. Bad Alex claimed she had a foolproof defense, but I wasn't so sure. As soon as the box was out in the main room, I filed a class-action case against her as "The Good Alex representing the people of CCM vs. Bad Alex for harassment."

This seems like a good stopping point for this post. I suspect that CCM will be broken up into about 5 or 6 posts total, since I took notes and everything. Please stay tuned! ♥

Pornography Rant

I'm going to reasume my narrative tomorrow (I have my next post written, too) but I've decided I'm going to share this here. I wrote this post on tumblr, in response to a fellow tumblr user who posted a piece of original writing content talking about how sad the lives of people who make pornography are and expressing a lot of judgements that are based on facts that just aren't true. 

I don't often respond to poking like that with a rant. In fact, I basically forced myself not to get involved in the comment threads on several posts on similar topics recently because I knew that I'd get impassioned and angry and get less work done because I'll be constantly refreshing the thread. But this one just got me between the ribs and I HAD to write this. It just happened. 

Because this is a repost from a different forum, it's much more generically written than my usual prose. There's no cast page on my tumblr. There's no expectation that people who read it when it's been reblogged will even have any idea who I am. So I sound a little different than I usually do here. It's still me, though. 

Posting here will also allow people who aren't tumblr users to comment on this post if they want to. 

Today was the third time recently that I saw a post that was made by someone who was involved in a porn sharing community but was not involved in the professional production of pornography who had negative things to say about people who create porn.

While I don’t do traditional pornography, I personally identify spanking videos, bondage pictures, other fetish films and even a lot of the more erotic art nudes that I do as porn. It’s explicit. It’s designed to make you horny. A lot of people don’t want to admit that, but I don’t mind saying so. Porn doesn’t have to be a bad word. Porn can, and probably should be, happily produced, positive, artistic stuff that makes you want to touch yourself.

I love making porn. I want to clear up some myths about it for you:

• I don’t do porn because I have to. I chose to out of my free will.
• I have an amazing education. The details of this aren’t important to this argument, nor do they need to be public knowledge, and I’m not going to tell you how smart I think I am, because no one wants to hear that, but I have a very respectable degree from an excellent school. I choose to do porn in addition to working freelance in a creative field. This combination makes me happy. I’m not an anomaly here. I actually know more girls who do porn that have degrees than who don’t.This is what we chose to do with our lives for our happiness.
• I’ve never met someone who felt that they had to engage in this profession, or even who didn’t enjoy what they did. I’ve met people who stopped having fun with it and so they quit, but I’ve never met someone who felt “stuck" doing this. The number of people with “regular jobs" who hate what they do but feel that they are stuck in it and can’t change their lives is pretty high.
• I really enjoy the people and companies that I work with. While I sometimes work with producers who aren’t respectful or enjoyable to work with, there’s enough work out there that I just stop working with them and find other people who I do like. 
• I have fun at my job. Sure, there’s a TON of real work that goes into making videos. A lot of days I sit at home answering email for 8 hours. Other days I have traveling hell. Other days I’m tired and cranky and have my period and don’t want to get pretty and naked, but that’s my job so I do it. That’s because this is my job. Jobs are never always fun. But I can safely say that some of the most enjoyable moments of my ENTIRE LIFE have involved filming spanking videos, and I met several of my best friends, play partners and the man I’m in love withthrough this job.
• I make enough money to support myself, pay off my student loans, save some and occasionally do or get nice things that I don’t need. Having a life that I enjoy and that lets me do those things seems pretty damn ideal.
• I don’t lead a double life. My family (both of origin and the family I’ve chosen for myself) know what I do. I had a wonderful relationship with my eldest brother until he passed away, and continue to have one with my other brother and he’s no less successful at his life because his baby sister takes her clothes off on the internet for living. My mother and I are currently having the most positive relationship that we’ve ever had in my entire life (since she’s emotionally unstable for reasons unrelated to my pornography). I don’t have a dad. I’m pretty sure that’s not why I do porn, though.
• Being poly, I have two stable and loving relationships with men that I adore and respect and who reciprocate those feelings. Neither of these relationships has been negatively affected in the tiniest bit by my internet nudity. Like I said above, I met one of my partners through the industry. 
• I’m a very ambitious person. I work hard and I am constantly continuing to educate myself. Part of my ambition is to be a happy person, and my job helps me to fulfill that goal.
• People often say that girls who do porn have no self respect. I beg to differ on this. It takes a TREMENDOUS amount of self respect, positive self image, confidence and even amore propre to be sufficiently comfortable with yourself to get undressed in front of a crew of people, put yourself into a vulnerable position (in my case, getting hit with stuff, in other cases, engaging in sexual intercourse or indulging another fetish) and have the poise to perform, roleplay and do your appropriate part. When I was younger, I was ashamed of myself. I was ashamed of my sexuality, my fetish, my body, my desires. I couldn’t stand anyone else knowing about these things, seeing my body, being intimate with me. I do porn because I love myself. Because my body, my fetish and my sexuality are beautiful and I want to share these things with others. 
• Porn, especially fetish porn, is actually important. Fetish porn allows people to realize that they aren’t the only people who are interested in what they are, to visualize their fantasies when they can’t connect with people in their personal lives and to be validated that what they like is okay. Despite how deeply involved I am in the creation of porn, I’m still a consumer of spanking pornography. I have subscriptions to five sites, and I watch them for my personal enjoyment, especially when I am unable to play for periods of time. There are lots of people for whom videos are the only way that they interact with their fetish. This is very important to them. Even when it’s not something so near and dear to someone’s heart, porn makes people happy. It doesn’t save anyone’s life. This is true. Neither does art. Neither does working in sales. Neither does designing roller coasters. The amount of people I know whose jobs are actually “necessary" when you really get down to it can be counted on the fingers of one hand. I have a job that makes other people AND me happy. That’s a win.
• In the past twelve months, I traveled to over fifteen cities in three countries, had “perfect attendance" at the complete roster of national spanking parties and got to visit tons and tons of my friends who live all around the world. I choose my own hours and often do my administrative work from my bed, while wearing a t-shirt and panties and dancing in place to Joy Division. This lifestyle suits me far better than sitting at a desk all day. 
• Just because you watched a documentary about porn doesn’t mean that you know more about it than people who do this for a living. I watched a documentary about being transgendered. This doesn’t mean that I can go up to a transperson and tell them how they feel. If I did that, I’d hope I’d get punched in the teeth. Furthermore, I bet I could make a documentary about your life that makes you look exploited and unhappy if it served my purposes. 
• Doing porn doesn’t make me a loser. It doesn’t make me a failure. It makes me a happy, independent woman who respects herself, supports herself and has adventures. Fuck yes.

Porn is valid. It isn’t disgusting. I’m not disgusting. I’m not a fuck up. Neither are my friends. 

If you do porn and you aren’t happy with your life, feel free to call me out and tell me about how your experience is different than mine. Then stop doing porn and find something that does make you happy. Just like if sitting at your desk all day doesn’t make you happy you should stop sitting at your desk and do something else. 

Real Spankings Shoot Three: Meeting Masterson

Following my trip to Texas and about a week of downtime in South Dakota, I took off for Denver. This was the start of a series of ridiculously wonderful adventures and I'm very glad to be sharing them now! I arrived in Denver with the plan to visit with Amoni for a while (and of course take photos together) and shoot for Real Spankings before heading off to a cabin with Paul for over two weeks of alone time. Amoni got me from the airport and we had a series of nice adventures together, including but not limited to attending a Scarlet Moons spanking party for an evening, jumping on her trampoline (is this a theme? Yes, yes it is) and a delightful photo shoot.

The night before my Real Spankings shoot, I was feeling a little bit nervous. I've shot with them two other times before, and had a wonderful, if very painful experience both times. The first time, I was topped by Betty Blaze for all of my scenes. This was very comfortable for me, because we got along well right away and I felt like it was easy for me to be myself around her. I felt a bit nervous when I had to do clips that involved me being interviewed on camera because that's not my strongest suit, but the actual spankings were really fun and enjoyable to film.

One of my first RSI scenes. This hurt and was very sore after, but the scene was really immersive and fun to film!

The second day that I filmed it was with Danny Creighton topping me. I'd met and hung out with Danny before, and we'd played at a Scarlet Moons party a few months before that, so I felt very at ease being spanked by him. The details of that shoot are in this post, but it was both fun and challenging, since I did the "School Swats" and "School Strokes" series and those were both quite hard spankings.

From my second shoot.

The shoot that I was getting ready for was going to be with Michael Masterson. I'd never met him before, and I'd been told by everyone who had worked with him that he was very nice and personable. He'd also been very friendly towards me on the internet. That said, I was pretty intimidated. I'd been watching him spank girls crazy hard for... years. It's also always a bit weird for me when I meet someone in real life who I had been aware of on the internet for a long time. I feel kind of shy and self conscious around them. This was at it's most severe when I first met Paul, because I'd had an internet crush on him for a long time (sidenote: yes, I realize that my current situation is one that people usually don't get to have. Luckiest girl on the internet, right here!) so I was extremely shy around him and kept sort of looking at the floor and talking in a quiet voice. With Michael, I felt pretty confident about the idea of meeting him and talking to him, but I was a bit jittery at the thought of being spanked by him. During the time in my life where marking and obvious severity were important to me in the content that I viewed, I'd looked at a lot of his work because it really satisfied those requirements. I'd seen countless girls reduced to tears by him over the years. Was I next?

When I arrived at the filming location, I was full of nervous energy. We hadn't really planned out any shoot ideas in advance, but I knew we were going to do four scenes, split between the two sites. I came into the house and saw Betty, who I'm always happy to see. She's friendly and fun, and I really enjoy being around her at shoots. Then I met Michael, who was very friendly and personable. I hope I didn't act too nervous as we sat on the sofas and chatted, so he could get to know me a little bit. I talked about other shoots I'd done, and my personal preferences. At one point, he mentioned how he's always had trouble finding other good Tops for the site.

"Oh yeah, I remember you writing that on your blog in like, 2005." I said. I *did* remember that. Michael's blog was one of the first ones that I followed (along with spanking blog and Adele Haze's blog. I don't know why those three were the ones I got into, I just found them and started reading :D) and I distinctly remember the post in which he discussed what it took to be a good Top on film and how difficult it was to find people who fit those requirements.

I think Michael was pretty surprised that not only was I very familiar with his sites and all the content that they'd done over the years but that I was able to remember details from eight year old blog posts. I worried that this made me creepy, but I know that personally I find it very complimentary when people can converse with me in a way that makes it obvious that they actually read what I write, so I hoped he took it the same way.

We then started talking about what my limitations in terms of what I'd want to do were. I felt pretty open for anything, but I was honest about one thing that was important to me. "I'd rather do my most severe scene OTK, since that position makes it much easier for me to take something hard." Real Spankings does a lot of bent over positions, even lunge position type spankings and if I'm getting spanked particularly hard, I start to be afraid that I'm going to fall over in these poses. I *can* take hard spankings in these positions, but if I don't have to focus on holding myself up, I feel more vulnerable and safe and react better. Michael asked me what kind of thing I was thinking of. "I could go for a hard spanking with a hairbrush or something like that," I suggested.

Masterson was obviously pleased by this suggestion. Apparently a lot of girls don't just show up and ask for hard hairbrush spankings. I do! That kind of scene is very core to my kink, and I love it when I can do videos that embrace the things that are very "me" like that. The fact that we decided to do that as a school girl scene made it even better.

We then got on to doing our first two scenes. They're for Real Spankings.com (not RSI) and haven't been released yet. The first one was a pretty long and hard hand spanking scene. I felt a bit nervous as we started, but the scene was straight forward and moved very quickly into the spanking, and as soon as it started, I felt calmer. It was hard, and certainly not playful, but it felt quite comfortably within my tolerance, and I appreciated the fact that he wasn't trying to intimidate me right out the door and was obviously concerned about my emotional comfort, not just with making a great scene. This felt very mentally good, and I took the rest of the spanking in a good headspace.

The second scene was immediately following the first, as it was a "part two" in the same story. In this scene, I got belted. I used to be kind of fearful of belts, but the more I get spanked with them, the more I've come to find that they fit very nicely into certain parts of my kink. They're very traditionally masculine, and I like the use of everyday objects for violent purposes :D. For this scene, I was bent over the bed and I tried my best not to move from my position too much. The belt hurt, though. Lots and lots. I cried out and struggled a little bit, but again, I felt very secure throughout the entire scene.

We took a bit of a break after that, and then moved to doing the Real Spankings Institute scenes. The first one of these was a strapping scene where I was bent over and holding onto the railing in the hallway. I liked the very public and on-the-spot nature of the scene. The strap hurt plenty, too. It carried a lot more weight than the belt had, and each stroke made me jut forward a bit and whimper or cry out.

My bottom is red and my face is concerned. :)

This scene had a somewhat longer spanking, although again it got to the action pretty quickly. My character was a little bit sulky about what was happening to her. It's very unfair being me sometimes!

Sore!

I was impressed with Michael's technical finesse, although it makes sense, since he's been doing this for a long time. My bottom was covered in a box of red, without any strokes deviating from where they should have been. Perfect coverage and a lot of soreness.

We went on to film the final scene immediately after this one, pretty much. The idea was that in the first scene, The Dean had come to get me to strap me because I'd gotten in trouble by the Head Girl earlier in the day and he had warned me that if I had to be punished again that week, it would be severe before sending me off to class. I suppose I just sat in my room and pouted for a little while, because I then realized that I was late for class and came thundering down the staircase. This meant running in actual corridors with carrying schoolbooks. Fun. I wish I could do that all the time! (I suppose I could just do this in my apartment, but that's not very fun.)

The Dean, of course, caught me, and was impressed with my incorrigibility (thanks, so am I! It's a talent, getting into so much trouble) since he had just spanked me in the hallway a few minutes before. He asked me why I was late and I responded with "It's your fault, because you were spanking me!"

Not my best plan. I was quickly lead into the lounge, where he returned with a brush. This was no ordinary hairbrush, but a Vermont Country Store bathbrush. If you aren't familiar, it's basically a legendary implement because it hurts. A lot. It's a very unforgiving wood, and it has a fairly long handle for the size of the spanking surface, which means that it gets a lot of momentum and then throws that all down over a small area. Michael warned me in advance that it's the kind of thing that when used as hard as he was going to (gulp) would often leave a girl particularly bruised. I wasn't worried about this. Between the amount of spanking that I get on a regular basis, my skin care regime and the foods that I make sure I include in my diet, my butt rarely ever meets it's match anymore, and while things hurt like hell still, I never really end up looking damaged.

Michael put me over his lap and started to spank me with the brush, scolding me about my irresponsibility and attitude. The brush was tremendously painful. It was blinding, clarifying pain: the kind of thing where I simply can't think about anything else. I just existed in that moment, with my white panties down around my knees and my bottom pushed up where it was most accessible to that horrible brush which collided with me again and again and again. I wailed and my face contorted with pain. I struggled a bit, throwing my hand back. Masterson caught it and held it firmly, and this pacified me a bit as the spanking continued. It was horribly wonderful. I felt sore and swollen and my flesh was burning hot by the time that it was finished. My throat hurt from wailing so much. It was exactly the kind of scene that I had wanted.

After I caught my breath from this last scene, I felt very pleased with myself. In a way, it had been just as severe as I had been worried it would have been, but this hadn't been a hinderance to me. It was hardly even a challenge. It was delightful to engage in such a tough scene. I was full of endorphins and adrenaline, and felt on cloud nine. I did it! I took it and took it well. :D

Once I had done my paperwork, Amoni got to come in and view the sets and meet everyone, which was very exciting for her, since she's also a fan of the sites. I excitedly told her all about the spankings I had gotten and showed her my butt.

It hurt to sit in the car on the way back to our friends' house were we were going to hang out. I squirmed in the seat a bit. Once we did get back, Amoni gave me a long lotion rub to soothe my skin and help me to calm down from my jittery excitement. She's a very good friend.

It's shiny from lotion, but basically magenta colored. See? No real bruising! :D

I'm very happy with the way that this shoot went, and I think that the videos are great. You should probably go check them out. I can't wait until I get to go shoot for them again: I'm hoping to maybe get out in that direction again before the end of the summer. We'll see.

Spanking Modeling: A Year in Review

Note: this post is extremely photo heavy. It's basically a walk down memory lane for my first year of modeling.

Just over a year ago, I did my first shoot as a spanking model. At the time, I set goals (as I often do) for the coming year. I tend to set my goals fairly high, and so I thought that a good point to strive towards would be working with ten sites or projects in my first year as a spanking model.

As it turns out, I've worked with seventeen, not counting my own clips store which I'm now operating.

I'm very proud of myself for this: I've had a lot of ups and downs, a couple of bad experiences and I've had my fair share of struggles in my personal life, but at the end of my first year, I feel that I'm doing really well.

My very first shoot was with Assume the Position Studios in Los Angeles (I'm currently also selling the content that we shot on my clips store). I remember the shoot well: I was very nervous, and still sort of a newcomer to the spanking scene in general. It was only less than a year before then that I had started going to munches and meeting people, instead of just interacting with SF, like I had done for the first many years of my spanking experience. The scenes that we shot were quite hard, still some of the hardest that I've done for a shoot, and they were taken at a time when I was still talented at bruising (I have since largely lost the ability to bruise).

I see this photo lots of places online without me being credited. That's my butt. :D

The second shoot that I did was pretty shortly thereafter: I shot with Lily Starr Spanking when Lily visited LA. That was an awesome shoot: I got to meet Lily, Robert and another friend of theirs, and we forged friendships that are still strong and vibrant today. The videos that we filmed then are also available on my store.

Lily's bear has ended up in a lot of videos with the two of us!

This is one of the only videos that includes me in the corner, which is still pretty much my natural habitat!

My third shoot was very exciting: I shot with Spanking Court, and once again, I met people who I continue to consider my very close friends. In this case, I got to meet Cali Katerina, Dana Kane, The Villain and more lovely people. This particular shoot was exciting because I had a full size paddle broken on my butt for the first time.

This shoot was the first time that I shot for a larger production company, and it was very exciting indeed. The video seems to be pretty popular, and it was released on VOD in addition to on the Spanking Court site.

The next shoot that I did was with Chelsea Pfeiffer for Good Spanking. It was a half hour "Chelsea Spanks" reality shoot, and it was a lot of fun. I really enjoyed Chelsea, and I love long spankings. This was around the time when I noticed that I wasn't really bruising anymore: I got spanked for a half an hour, and while my butt stayed red for a long time (more than overnight) it wasn't bruised. This was also released on DVD.

After this, I did another shoot with Lily Starr. This time, it was just the two of us, and we had lots of fun being girly and silly during the shoot.

But we ended things with a wet bottomed, fully nude bathbrush spanking which brought me to tears:

SAD FACE!

After that, I moved to Sioux Falls, and I didn't do a spanking video again until my visit to Los Angeles.

I did a second series with Assume the Position: this time, I got to hang out with fellow model Christy Cutie and along with photodave, we shot a fun set of videos called The Spanking Games. They were basically Hunger Games spanking fan fiction (only, you know, way less dark and more adorable).

Spanked again!

Christy and me :D

Literally the day after that, I shot with Clare Fonda and The Cameraman for Girl Spanks Girl. This was one of my most exciting shoots. We did several sets with looks that worked really well for me, and the story was perfectly suited for my personality. The story is called "The Bad Good Girl" and basically sums me up: I'm sweet and innocent, but I somehow get myself into trouble anyway and feel very regretful about it.

I like the photos from this shoot way too much, so I hope this sampling is not excessive:

And, I got to be the last woman to spank Clare on camera! Winner! 

I also shot with Lily and Robert again. This time, we did one cute, story based video a discipline video with me and Robert which ended up being very severe (and popular) indeed.

I love this angle

Yeah, that bruised.

After that, I did my next shoot for a DVD: Sternwood Academy. This was just an amazing shoot. I got to see Dana Kane, Cali Katerina and The Villain again, and I was lucky to meet Ela Darling and Cheyenne Jewel, who were total sweethearts. Sternwood was pretty much the most fun thing I've ever done in a plaid skirt, and I have done a lot of things in plaid skirts.

With Heather Green (and an awesome bow)

Cali Katerina, Ela Darling, me, Cheyenne Jewel and Heather Green

My next set of shooting took place at the Texas All State Spanking Party. I had the honor of shooting with Pandora Blake for Dreams of Spanking. We've taken some down time before releasing, but the first clip from this will be up on both our sites today! Here's a sneak peak:

Pandora was amazing, and I can't wait to work with her again. I'm..er.. very fond of her. Those are good words for it. :D

I also shot with Ten for Ten Amorette's Punishment Playhouse. We had a freaking blast with those clips, and they included me as a school girl getting into trouble as usual, me getting naked and spanking myself in front of the window and me making out with Ten. Not a bad mix, if you ask me. :D

Heather Green, Ten Amorette, me

 I also shot for Spanking 101 and Amateur Spankings during TASSP, but neither of these have been released to date. During Crimson Moon in July, I shot for a site called Saturday Spanking Club, but that site hasn't gone live yet.

My next batch of shoots was during my recent set of travels: I shot with Dallas Spanks Hard for my third DVD, this one is a feature entitled "Naughty Nightmare."

I also shot several new videos with Lily Starr (yeah, we did work in addition to eating sushi. Hard to believe, right?) This time, I topped her for the first time, which was very exciting for me. The video in which I top her also includes us kissing. Hot stuff. :D

Alex the Top!

Naked, sunburned, crying Alex the bottom!

I also did two of my own productions while in LA: one in association with my boyfriend, Just_Rafa (who is amazing in all ways) and my friend Maddy Marks:

I'm getting better and better at Topping. :D
The other was with Odette Delacroix, and is forthcoming.

My next set of shoots was with Firm Discipline in Texas. We did a boatload of videos together while I was there, including some pretty epic moments, like me, debs and Mila Kohl all getting spanked a row and me throwing debs and Heather Green into the pool.

After a thorough spanking

Fighting with my "sister" Mila

All lined up, and all marked up. 

Toppy Alex pwning debs

I felt that.

Spanking Heather Green OTK

After I threw them into the pool :P

I have, since then, done another shoot with Amateur Spankings and shot for Spanked Call Girls, Spanking Sorority Girls, Shadowlane and Northern Spanking, but I don't have any photos for those shoots yet, as they are as of now unreleased.

All in all, it's been a remarkable year, and far more amazing than I ever could have dreamed. Things are only getting more and more exciting, too, and I have lots of great plans for the future.
:D

Shadowlane Highlights

I was going to somehow try to skip writing about Shadowlane, because I don't really like writing posts which are just "this happened. Then this happened. Then this happened!" and because so many other people (especially Erica Scott and Beth Eisley) have written great posts describing the party. That said, I do have good stories, and stories are part of what my blog is all about. Also, I'm going to feel a bit more "free" once I'm entirely caught up on what I'm "supposed" to post about.

Heather and I arrived in Vegas on Wednesday afternoon, and we got dressed in better clothes and did our makeup in the parking lot.

Much more presentable than I was before we Vegased ourselves up

We then went to Holstein's in the Cosmopolitan: a place where we had eaten during our first trip to Vegas.  I ordered something which was called the "Nom Nom Burger" pretty much entirely because of the name. It had potato chips on it. I nommed. Heather and I got an alcoholic coke float which also included poprocks. It was amazing.

OM NOM NOM

We went into a couple of stores, but then Heather had a session to go to, so she dropped me off with Ten and Drlectr at the Suncoast, the hotel where the party was held. I have infinite love for those two. We hung out a little bit, then we went to go get all you can eat enchiladas and margaritas. I had JUST finished eating my Nom Nom Burger, so I just got a margarita. It was massive and delicious. I didn't even finish it in the time that it took my friends to each eat two plates of enchiladas.

Ten and Drlectr were going to a show that night, and I was feeling tired and wanted to get to Dana Kane's house, where we were staying over, so I decided to stay and hang out in the hotel. Fortunately, I met up with Richard Windsor and Tomdiscp at the bar, and they proceeded to buy me drinks and chat me up. Richard is at the top of the list of people I wish I had been able to spend more time with: he's funny, clever, caring, respectful and nice to be around. Also, he let me wear his hat:

I hope that some Richard Windsor/Alex Reynolds collaborations are coming in the future!

While hanging out at the bar, I also got to meet Caroline Grey, the Canadian spanking model living Ireland. She was all jet lagged but still all awesome. I kept drinking (which, in case you've noticed a lack of posts about me drinking, I really don't do very much of that anymore) and by the time Heather picked me up, I was texting Heather Wayland (The Boss of Me) and telling her that I was "too drink" to come visit her that night. Sounds about right. I sobered up while Heather drove me over to Dana's.

It was awesome to see Dana and her husband! I first met them nearly a year ago when I did my first Spanking Court shoot, and I really got to know them when Heather and I stayed in an apartment with them during the production of Sternwood Academy. We got there close to the time at which they were preparing for bed, and we were tired, so we spent a little bit of time hanging out and then got ready to sleep. I did sneak a peek at Dana's closet full of implements, though. My god, that thing is FULL OF IMPLEMENTS. It puts my collection to shame. Just the sheer amount of canes that she has startled me. She saw me eying them and told me: "I break a lot of canes." I suppose that's probably accurate. Ouch!

Dana has a cat named Noodle that I'm kind of in love with. He doesn't seem to understand that he's a cat and therefore is supposed to be aloof. He's so dog like, in fact, that he plays fetch and actively tries to get pets and cuddles. He also tries to eat human food and go places he shouldn't, but all in all, he's a very lovable scamp. I added this to my collection of photos of me with famous spankos cats:

I think that collection was previously full of just Clare Fonda's cats. 

The next morning we had some breakfast and then hung out a bit. Dana gave us some good advice, and we enjoyed both of our friends' company a little bit more before we had to go. They were not able to attend the party, which was sad for everyone, but I'm glad that we got to visit them before it got into full swing.

We packed up our stuff and drove back to the hotel, where we got ready to do a shoot for the Clare Fonda sites. I really love working with The Camera Man, and this time, I got to meet and shoot with Veronica Ricci. She's A LOT OF fun to work with, and incredibly hot.

Later, I met up with and hung out with my friend, Whooperine. We've been at every party together, and we had the same first party, so that's kind of a neat thing we've got going on. He had a pretty awesome suite, and I had fun taking a tour of it with him. I discovered that his bathroom included THE SUPER CORNER:

It's probably not good for claustrophobic spankos, but I found it very comforting. Extra wall-hug!

His bed also had about 80 pillows on it, so I made a giant, plus mountain to lay over:

Most. Comfortable. Spanking position. Ever. :D

Later still, I finally met up with Heather W. We've known each other online for ages, but had never had a chance to be in the same place at the same time. There was hugging and photo taking and rejoicing. I also met Beth Eisley for the first time and fell instantly in love. Ugh. She's the best. She's perfectly cute, super sweet, and incredibly smart. I'm smitten.

That evening, we went to a bunch of suite parties and drlectr gave me my first night, midnight paddling during a mass group effort. This is the part of the story where the details kind of break down. I did a lot of hanging out with awesome people, and I had a lot of fun, but I didn't stay up too late because the next morning was my shoot for Shadowlane itself!

Unfortunately, the Shadowlane shoot didn't go perfectly smoothly. There were mixups about time schedules, so the scene which had originally been planned for me and Mila Kohl never got shot. We did get to do a scene with Amy Hunter, though, which was most excellent, and I think turned out very well. I'm just disappointed that we didn't get to do anything full length. Eve did say that she would have me back to work again when it wasn't so hectic. I don't have any pictures from the shoot yet, but I'll show you when I do.

After I finished with Shadowlane, it was time for me to shoot with Northern Spanking. This was very exciting to me, because there's something very thrilling about being on sites overseas. The Top for the scene that I shot was Stephen Lewis, who I'd seen in many videos but never had a chance to meet before, and I was very excited about that. I don't give away the storylines for shoots before the content goes up, but I will say that the scene which we shot (which also included Heather Green) was very formal. It was, in fact, the most formal scene I've ever participated in. It totally pushed my buttons in all the right ways. I feel like it is almost inappropriate that I like being spanked by English people so much, like it is some how linked to hegemony or fetishizing the other or whatnot. But the truth is, the stories that I first encountered when I discovered that there were stories involving spanking where all stories written in England and they were all overflowing with formality. When I got into my first spanking relationship, it was with SF, who is both English and ridiculously formal. Stephen had the same sort of thing going on in this scene: he was formal and rigid without seeming cruel or even cold. I just ate it up. It was one of the best scenes I've ever done for a video. Everyone from Northern Spanking was incredibly nice, friendly and accommodating. I'm planning to get over to the UK sooner rather than later, and I look forward to working with them again when I do!

That evening was the Vendor Fair, I think. I'm having trouble with the timeline of things, again. I got to see Erica again, which was wonderful, and to meet her boyfriend, John. He's a really great guy, and I was very impressed with him. I wasn't vending, so I wandered from booth to booth and said hi to lots of people. I noticed at Ten's booth that I was on the cover of one of her DVDs. Sweet!

I'm on the bottom right. :)

Heather and I also hung out with Veronica a little more, and we ended up talking Pokemon. Uh, can you say BFFs?

Later that night, Heather and I participated in the Spankolympics, as hosted by Northern Spanking. We only did the first event before the room got too hot and noisy for us, but we owned it: we took the gold medal in "sprinting," which meant that Heather had to spank me 100 times as quickly as possible. Due to her extreme physical fitness, we did better than a bunch of "real" tops (Heather is pretty much just a bottom) and finished in 15 seconds. WINNERS.

We spent the rest of the evening hanging out at suite parties and having fun. I also changed my clothes six or seven times.

This is me as a contrite school girl.

I don't remember too much of what happened during the day on Saturday-- I think I was mostly working, in either shoots or sessions. I know that when I saw Erica at dinner she told me that she didn't see me at all that day, so that's probably the most accurate description. Eventually, though, I did start getting ready for the banquet.

Now, let me start off by saying that I've never been much of a girly-girl, in case you haven't noticed. I'm in my element in clothes that I got six or seven years ago and don't quite match each other, a kind of fluffy skirt, a panda t-shirt, maybe a pair of knee socks and my now overly worn saddle shoes which were once upon a time, kind of fancy. I get girlied up for shoots, but I've never been super at it. Recently, though, I've wanted to embrace that side of things more. The Heathers helped me with this: they helped me pick out my outfit, Heather W picked out my bling and did my makeup and Heather G straightened my hair for me. Heather W suggested that I should wear a pair of her heels. I did it. I was about six feet tall with them on, but instead of feeling HUGE I felt beautiful. It helped that everyone kept fawning over how good I looked all dressed up. It also helped when Beth showed up at the door in her underwear and just said "HAIRSPRAY?!"

There's a sexier photo of me somewhere. I will obtain it and post it later.

The banquet itself was a lot of fun. There was pretty good food and I got three pieces of cake, so that I could sample them and decide which one was the best.

The best part was after we finished eating, though, and they played some slow dancing music. I never really had a traditional "prom" experience. I went to two, but one was with The Worst Boyfriend Ever and the other I got basically thrown out of for being there with a girl. I've always wanted to slow dance, but neither of my boyfriends are really the type for it (I don't THINK Rafa and I ever slow danced together. Maybe we did at graduation or something. Unclear). Anyway, Whooperine and I danced together and he didn't even tell me to take my shoes off. It was kind of magical-- everyone kept telling me I was pretty and that I looked great and none of it was backhanded. Everyone I ran into was smiling at me because they actually liked me. I was slow dancing with a boy, not sitting at some back table being an outcast. I try not to be mushy, but the experience was all kind of a dream come true. I might have teared up from happiness at one point.

Later, the music picked up and we all danced to fast songs, which I am horrible at, but was not ashamed about. At one point, our dance circle included me, Heather G, Erica, Sarah Gregory, Princess Kelley and Mila Kohl. It was probably pretty hot. I was constantly surprised at how all the girls in my age group knew every song they played. "These songs were my college years!" Kelley explained. Ah. Right. I never heard any songs during my college years, because you are not allowed to play the radio in the library. :P

Again, the evening was spent bouncing around from suite party to suite party, catching up with people and having a blast. Sunday morning was the Corporal Punishment Court (I think) and I came dressed like this:

Court was ridiculously fun. Almost all the cases were really funny, and they left me rolling around with laughter. Beth brought a case against someone which was really adorable, and there was a Heather vs. Heather case, because "regular Heather" (Heather Green) kept losing her key to the room and asking Heather W for it. Anyone who knows Heather G would not be surprised by this at all: when we lived together, the two of us were frequently in trouble over lost keys. This is a habit which enough being in trouble got rid of for me, but apparently not for Heather. Anyway, having fun at the expense of your friends is what friendship is all about, right? This time, it was at the expense of six strokes with a leather implement, delivered by StrictDave. As a side note, Dave was very impressive to watch as a Top. We didn't scene together (he's on the list of people I would have liked to spend more time with) but I was blown away by his technical proficiency when delivering a spanking. The man clearly knows what he's doing, and he turns a spanking into some kind of crazy dance.

The rest of the party was much more relaxed for me. I hung out with people and chatted, had some fun scenes, got to know knew people and catch up with those I've known a long time and just have fun.
I could go into the play by play of the last day, but really, I don't have the energy to do things justice, so I'll say this: the people at Shadowlane made the party amazing for me. I love so many of them, and I felt wonderfully at home and accepted.

It was the best party ever. The only thing that would have made it better would have been in Malignus could have been there with me. And ellee. And Naomi. So, more people. But especially Malignus. Being away from him for six weeks was a long time.

After Shadowlane was officially over, Whooperine and I spent an extra night in Vegas at The Mirage. This involved lots of fanciness: we had a big, beautiful room with a wonderful view of the Strip, he had rented a Porsche which we tooled around in, we watched La Reve, which was absolutely other worldly and we ate a really excellent meal beforehand. That evening, Ten, Drlectr, Jerry Diamond and his partner came to hang out in the hotel and we had lots of fun goofing around. Jerry consistantly referred to people as "Bob X" if X= the person's actual name and he had us all in hysterics. After they got tired and went back to where they were staying, I took a bath in the fancy tub and went to sleep. The next morning, after a bit of running around, Whooperine and I went to go see dolphins and tigers at the Mirage's Secret Garden before going to the airport. It was AWESOME.

I took this photo of two dolphins making out.

It was the perfect end to the perfect party. That afternoon, I went to the airport and got my flight home. I was delayed, of course, because this is me we're talking about, but by a bit after midnight, I was home again.

And home is wonderful place to be.