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Tuesday, January 24, 2012

The Care and Keeping of a Frequently Spanked Bottom

I don't know if you guys have noticed this or not, but I get spanked a lot. I almost always get a spanking at bedtime, and more often than not, I find myself getting some sort of impromptu spanking in addition to that.

The other day, one of my friends asked me how I manage to keep my butt from falling off when I get spanked so damn much (and often, so damn hard). It's a challenge, I will tell you! When I first moved in with Malignus and I was adapting to getting spanked so often, plus my skin was outraged at the change in climate and this "winter" thing that was happening, I had some problems with weird, hard, dried out skin on my bottom and thighs. Over the past couple of months, though, I've perfected my butt-skincare regime, which I will now share with all of you! I've written this in the form of instructions, but I certainly don't think that I'm the shining beacon of right in the black night of wrongness. I'm very open to suggestion, or to being ignored entirely. :P

Step 1: Lotion.

Lotion is a spanko bottom's BFF. There are a lot of kinds of lotion available-- there are special aftercare lotions offered by some places that sell implements and there are billions of types of lotion offered in stores. What should a spanko look for in a lotion? You probably want an unscented and uncolored lotion. Pretty, sparkly, nice smelling stuff tends to have things in it that cause irritation, and that's contrary to the cause of making the skin on your butt nice. If you're getting spanked, you already have enough butt irritation in your life. There are a couple of ingredients that are particularly good for the skin- Collagen Elastin is one and Vitamin E is another.

Personally, I use this: St. Ives Skin Renewing Lotion.

I do want to point out that products containing Collagen Elastin are generally very not vegan. I use this, because I am not a vegan and if my skin can be made better by slatering on stuff that came from some other skin, then I'm okay with that. :D

I've also had great success with Vitamin E Body Butter from The Body Shop. This is actually vegan, for all you vegan spankos.

Now that you've selected an excellent lotion, you need to use it. I suggest using it every morning and night, after every time that you shower, take a bath or otherwise emerse yourself in water and every time you get a spanking. I try to keep up with doing it that often and it works out well for me. The point of lotion is to keep your skin healthy and moisturized, and to keep it both strong and soft. It makes your skin less likely to break during a spanking, because most people don't want a bloody butt, and it also keeps the texture from feeling dry and gross.

Step 2: Baths

I take warm baths in order to relax. I also find it to be very good for my skin: it makes all the dead skin soften up and makes exfoliation (coming up!) easier, and if your skin has become hard from a spanking, it helps it to soften in the deeper layers. I also use Colloidal Oatmeal in my baths. Pretty much everyone I've offered this to says that it's lame, but it's incredibly soothing. It makes your skin feel wonderfully soft, too. Most importantly, you know how if you eat a really spicy dish and your mouth hurts, drinking water will actually make it worse? You're supposed to eat bread? My friend, Peachy, just told me that if you make a paste of Colloidal Oatmeal and rub it on your butt, it can help to neutralize the effects of capsaicin in the same way (if you are sad and unfortunate enough to have it put there by a sadist). I haven't actually tested this myself, but the theory behind it is sound. The most common brand of Colloidal Oatmeal is Aveeno. That is what I use.

Most things that say that they are good for sunburns are also good post-spanking, jsyk!
IMPORTANT NOTE ABOUT OATMEAL BATHS: be sure to clean out your tub after you drain all the water out, or else the residue from the oatmeal ends up looking like you got drunk and puked in your tub. You might want to keep this in mind if you ever want to do a prank that involves making it look like someone got drunk and puked in the tub, though. (I know how you brats are, with your pranking!)

Step 3: Exfoliation

Depending on how much of a callous you get on your butt, you might need to exfoliate a little or a lot. A little bit of exfoliation would be kind of scrubbing with a washcloth or a sponge in the shower. A medium amount involves actually using the brush side of a bath brush (WHO WOULD HAVE THOUGHT?!) or a loofa (also in the shower.) Personally, because I fear getting a calloused butt and I get spanked ALL THE TIME, I've taken to using the gentler side of a foot-file while I'm in the bath. If it hurts, you're being too rough (so, the opposite of the way things usually are). After you exfoliate, use moar lotion.

THIS IS EXTREMELY IMPORTANT: DO NOT exfoliate just after a hard scene. DO NOT DO NOT DO NOT. Even a little. Don't even rub a washcloth on your butt. You know what will happen? Your skin will all come off. That is what will happen. I may or may not have discovered that the hard way.

Afterthought: Arnica and bruise reduction

Most spankos seem to swear by arnica for healing bruises. Healing bruises is not part of skin care, but I am going to talk about it right now anyway, because it *is* part of butt care. Personally, there is only one time when I care about healing up my bruises, and that's when I'm modeling. In my day to day life, I like to have a bruised bottom. It makes me happy. That said: the times that I've used arnica in its various forms, I have seen no measurable improvement in the healing time on my bruising. What DOES seem to work well is using ice immediately after a spanking (but not if you're getting spanked more that night, ugh!) and massaging my butt a lot. Hand spankings count as a massage.

That's all I've got. How do you do your butt-care? Do you have any tips or tricks that I left off? Let me know in the comments!


  1. This was an interesting and important subject. I am not a heavy player and, at 62, I am very new to the scene, though I have had the spanking urges since about 5.

    I am fortunate enough if I get a spanking once a month! I am one of those who doesn't like bruising, though I do a bit. Just have to accept that.

    One of the things that I have used for pain relief is Trameel. It comes as a gel, lotion, and also sublingual. It has a host of stuff in it, as well as some arnica, and it does work. I use it for other things than on my bottom, but it has relieved other kinds of pain for me. I also like to put lavender oil on first and then the Trameel. That combination is wonderful and smells good, too. I have done that for my freaking hip pain and have felt better.

    Once, when I had poison oak, the doctor told me to take an oatmeal bath. I took oatmeal and put about 1/3 to 1/2 cup of oatmeal in a handkie and swished it around in the water and made sure it was just nice warm water, not hot. I used it to wash off with and surprisingly enough, it will clean you off. It was nice.

    Thanks for posting this because we do need to take care of ourselves.

    1. Thanks for the extra tips! I'll have to try our this kind of oatmeal bathing next time I'm out of the mix. :D

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  2. Like Bobbie Jo, I was just going to add that if someone doesn't want to go buy the oatmeal bath stuff, I just put raw oats in a sock, tie the top off, and let it sit in a hot bath for 5-10 minutes (until the water is tolerable). I've also noticed that once the sock has soaked, you can actually squeeze it over the problem areas and it seems to offer relief in some cases.


    1. Sounds good. I'm probably supposed to use my own sock for this, right? :P

  3. The arnica pills help as well, to prevent bruising. I prefer the pills over the gel, but they're a bit harder to find.

    Since you get spanked so much, you might wanna make it part of your vitamin routine! ;) (along with iron and Vitamin K)


    1. Thank you for reminding me that I need to pick up for vitamins! I usually take Vitamin K and a women's multivitamin with iron in it. Keeps me in good health so that I can take my beatings like a champ. :D

  4. Good tips! Lotion and exfoliating is good to keep your skin in good shape. For bruise care, NOTHING works for me. I've given up. Most who spank me expect to see me somewhat purple so I stopped attempting to prevent bruising. People swear by Arnica but it didn't help me. Neither did ice, taking Emergen-C daily, multi-vitamins, lotion, etc. Oh well, what can you do?

    1. The curse of magic marking strikes again! My bruises have definitely gotten paler the more I get spanked, but I still end up pretty well colored at the end of the day. Icing only works for me if I get it on quickly, and even then, it's more that things get less colorful than that it prevents them from forming. Plus, it feels nice. :D

  5. Very cool post. So things to have on hand for aftercare? Definitely taking notes on this one. ;-)

    1. Yes! Great stuff for tops to pick up to have around for pampering those bottoms! :D

  6. We use Vanicream, which is fragrance free, masking fragrance free, dye free, unscented. I first started using it for my dry skin during the winter time (my dermitologist suggested it) but my wife and I found it worked great on her well-punished butt. It's hard to find in stores, so I order it online.

  7. Thanks for the tips, Alex. I'll try to incorporate these tips in future sessions.

  8. I have found that vitamin K cream, applied twice a day will fade bruises within a day or two